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About Bender

Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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I woke up, sun shining through my window on Strada Ștefan cel Mare. Thought it was gonna be chill. But nah, life had other plans. First off, I spilled coffee all over my favorite shirt. Like, c’mon! It’s a white shirt! Now it’s a brown mess. Great start, right?

Two-year-old child in a serious state after falling into waste dump